Tefillah le-Zivug — The Prayer for Finding a Spouse
This heartfelt prayer asks God to bring one's destined partner — one's zivug — at the right time and in the right way. Rooted in the Jewish belief that matches are made in Heaven, it draws on language found in the Shelah (the Shnei Luchot ha-Brit, by Rabbi Isaiah Horowitz) and the Chuppat Chatаnim tradition. It is traditionally recited by a woman seeking a husband, though its spirit speaks to anyone longing for a loving, devoted partner. Wherever you come from, you are welcome to bring this prayer before God.
May it be Your will, Adonai my God and God of my forefathers,
that You bring me, in Your great mercy and Your abundant lovingkindness,
my fitting partner at the right time.
A proper match worthy of giving rise to a scholar of Torah,
great in learning and in the fear of God,
from the seed of the righteous and the people of truth and those who fear sin —
just as You arranged the match of Adam, the first human,
and for Abraham and Isaac and Jacob and Moses,
each one receiving his partner in his season and his time.
And may the man You bring me as my partner be:
a good man, handsome in his deeds and handsome in his appearance,
possessing good works, possessing grace,
a man of wisdom and the fear of God,
who pursues tzedakah and performs acts of chesed.
May there be in him no trace of disqualifying flaw, defect, or blemish,
and may he not be prone to anger or rage —
but rather may he be possessed of humility and gentleness of spirit,
healthy and strong.
And let not the cruelty of people or enemies,
nor their thoughts, their schemes, or their counsel,
delay my destined partner who has been prepared for me.
And may there be fulfilled in me the verse that is written:
'The scepter of the wicked shall not rest upon the lot of the righteous' —
and the verse that is written:
'Your wife like a fruitful vine in the inner chambers of your house,
your children like olive shoots around your table.'
For You are the One who settles the solitary into a home,
who brings the bound into freedom.
May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable before You,
Adonai, my rock and my redeemer.
Yehi ratzon milfanecha, Adonai Elohai ve-Elohei avotai,
shе-tamtzi li be-rachamecha ha-rabbim u-ve-chasadecha ha-gedolim
et zivugi ha-ra'ui li be-zmano.
Zivug hagun ha-ra'ui le-holid talmid chacham,
gadol ba-Torah u-ve-yir'ah,
mi-zera tzaddikim ve-anshei emet ve-yirei chet,
kemo she-hamtzeta zivugo shel Adam ha-Rishon,
ve-le-Avraham ve-Yitzchak ve-Yaakov u-Moshe,
kol echad ve-echad zivugo be-ito u-vi-zmano.
Ve-oto ish she-tamtzi li le-zivugi yeheh:
ish tov, ish na'eh be-ma'asav ve-na'eh be-mar'ehu,
ba'al ma'asim tovim, ba'al chen,
ish maskil ve-yare Elohim,
rodef tzedakah ve-gomel chesed.
Ve-lo yeheh bo shum shemetz pasul u-mum u-fegam,
ve-lo yeheh ka'assan ve-ragzan,
rak yeheh ba'al anavah ve-nemichut ru'ach,
bari u-va'al ko'ach.
Ve-al ye'akev achzariyut ha-beriyot ve-son'im
ve-machshevoteihem ve-tachbuloiteihem ve-mo'atzoteihem,
le-akev et ben zugi ha-muchan li.
Ve-yakum bi mikra she-katuv,
lo yanu'ach shevet ha-rasha al goral ha-tzaddikim,
u-mikra she-katuv,
ish'techa ke-gefen poriyah be-yarkitei veitecha,
vanecha ki-shtilei zeitim saviv le-shulchanecha.
Ki Atah hu ha-moshiv yechidim baitah,
motz'i asirim ba-kosharot.
Yiheyu le-ratzon imrei fi ve-hegyon libi lefanecha,
Adonai tzuri ve-go'ali.
Common Questions
The word zivug (זִוּוּג) means a match or partner — literally, a pairing. The Talmud teaches that forty days before a child is formed, a heavenly voice declares who that person's match will be (Sotah 2a). This does not mean human effort is unnecessary; rather, it means that prayer, virtue, and readiness help a person become worthy of — and open to — the partner God has set aside for them.
These five figures are invoked as precedents — proof that God actively arranges the right match for each person at the right time. Adam received Eve directly from God; Abraham sent his servant to find a wife for Isaac; Rebecca was found providentially; Jacob worked and waited for Rachel; and Moses, though his personal story was different, is included in this tradition as one whom God guided. Citing these ancestors is a classical Jewish rhetorical move: reminding God, so to speak, of what He has done before and asking Him to do it again.
The prayer is specific and practical: a man who is good, handsome in his deeds and in his appearance, possessing fine character and grace, wise and God-fearing, who pursues tzedakah (righteous giving) and performs acts of chesed (lovingkindness). It also asks that he be free of serious disqualifying flaw, not prone to anger or rage, and that he be humble, gentle of spirit, healthy, and strong. This list reflects a Jewish ethical ideal of character that balances inner virtue with outward dignity.
The prayer weaves in two scriptural verses as a kind of petition-through-prophecy. The first — 'The scepter of the wicked shall not rest upon the lot of the righteous' (Psalm 125:3) — is used here to pray that hostile forces or jealous people will not succeed in blocking the match. The second — 'Your wife like a fruitful vine in the inner chambers of your house, your children like olive shoots around your table' (Psalm 128:3) — is a classic image of domestic blessing, invoked as the hoped-for outcome of the prayer being answered.
The prayer is rooted in specifically Jewish language, scripture, and tradition — it addresses 'the God of my forefathers Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob' and draws on the Torah's narratives of matchmaking. A non-Jewish reader who is drawn to this prayer is warmly welcome to read, meditate on, and be moved by it. However, someone who does not share these ancestral reference points may wish to hold those phrases as a window into Jewish faith rather than as their own direct address, or to speak to God in their own words alongside this text. The longing at the heart of this prayer — for a worthy, loving partner — belongs to every human heart.
The text as written uses feminine grammatical forms and asks for 'a man' as a partner, suggesting it was composed for a woman praying for a husband. Some prayer collections include a parallel version adapted for a man. The underlying theology — that one's match is ordained by God and that prayer can help bring it about — applies equally regardless of gender, and many communities have adapted such prayers accordingly.